Chapter 8 - Josie Plays Mermaid

While the young Bhaers were having serious experiences at home, Josiewas enjoying herself immensely at Rocky Nook; for the Laurences knewhow to make summer idleness both charming and wholesome. Bess wasvery fond of her little cousin; Mrs Amy felt that whether her niecewas an actress or not she must be a gentlewoman, and gave her thesocial training which marks the well-bred woman everywhere; whileUncle Laurie was never happier than when rowing, riding, playing, orlounging with two gay girls beside him. Josie bloomed like a wildflower in this free life, Bess grew rosy, brisk, and merry, and bothwere great favourites with the neighbours, whose villas were by theshore or perched on the cliffs along the pretty bay.

One crumpled rose-leaf disturbed Josie's peace, one baffled wishfilled her with a longing which became a mania, and kept her asrestless and watchful as a detective with a case to 'work up'. MissCameron, the great actress, had hired one of the villas and retiredthither to rest and 'create' a new part for next season. She saw noone but a friend or two, had a private beach, and was invisibleexcept during her daily drive, or when the opera-glasses of curiousgazers were fixed on a blue figure disporting itself in the sea. TheLaurences knew her, but respected her privacy, and after a call lefther in peace till she expressed a wish for society - a courtesy whichshe remembered and repaid later, as we shall see.

But Josie was like a thirsty fly buzzing about a sealed honey-pot,for this nearness to her idol was both delightful and maddening. Shepined to see, hear, talk with, and study this great and happy womanwho could thrill thousands by her art, and win friends by her virtue,benevolence, and beauty. This was the sort of actress the girl meantto be, and few could object if the gift was really hers; for thestage needs just such women to purify and elevate the professionwhich should teach as well as amuse. If kindly Miss Cameron had knownwhat passionate love and longing burned in the bosom of the littlegirl whom she idly observed skipping over the rocks, splashing aboutthe beach, or galloping past her gate on a Shetland pony, she wouldhave made her happy by a look or a word. But being tired with herwinter's work and busy with her new part, the lady took no morenotice of this young neighbour than of the sea-gulls in the bay orthe daisies dancing in the fields. Nosegays left on her doorstep,serenades under her garden-wall, and the fixed stare of admiring eyeswere such familiar things that she scarcely minded them; and Josiegrew desperate when all her little attempts failed.

'I might climb that pine-tree and tumble off on her piazza roof, orget Sheltie to throw me just at her gate and be taken in fainting.It's no use to try to drown myself when she is bathing. I can't sink,and she'd only send a man to pull me out. What can I do? I will seeher and tell her my hopes and make her say I can act some day. Mammawould believe her; and if - oh, if she only would let me study withher, what perfect joy that would be!'

Josie made these remarks one afternoon as she and Bess prepared for aswim, a fishing party having prevented their morning bathe.

'You must bide your time, dear, and not be so impatient. Papapromised to give you a chance before the season is over, and healways manages things nicely. That will be better than any queerprank of yours,' answered Bess, tying her pretty hair in a white netto match her suit, while Josie made a little lobster of herself inscarlet.

'I hate to wait; but I suppose I must. Hope she will bathe thisafternoon, though it is low tide. She told Uncle she should have togo in then because in the morning people stared so and went on herbeach. Come and have a good dive from the big rock. No one round butnurses and babies, so we can romp and splash as much as we like.'

Away they went to have a fine time; for the little bay was free fromother bathers, and the babies greatly admired their aquaticgymnastics, both being expert swimmers.

As they sat dripping on the big rock Josie suddenly gave a clutchthat nearly sent Bess overboard, as she cried excitedly:

'There she is! Look! coming to bathe. How splendid! Oh, if she onlywould drown a little and let me save her! or even get her toe nippedby a crab; anything so I could go and speak!'

'Don't seem to look; she comes to be quiet and enjoy herself.Pretend we don't see her, that's only civil,' answered Bess,affecting to be absorbed in a white-winged yacht going by.

'Let's carelessly float that way as if going for seaweed on therocks. She can't mind if we are flat on our backs, with only ournoses out. Then when we can't help seeing her, we'll swim back as ifanxious to retire. That will impress her, and she may call to thankthe very polite young ladies who respect her wishes,' proposed Josie,whose lively fancy was always planning dramatic situations.

Just as they were going to slip from their rock, as if Fate relentedat last, Miss Cameron was seen to beckon wildly as she stoodwaist-deep in the water, looking down. She called to her maid, whoseemed searching along the beach for something, and not finding whatshe sought, waved a towel towards the girls as if summoning them tohelp her.

'Run, fly! she wants us, she wants us!' cried Josie, tumbling intothe water like a very energetic turtle, and swimming away in her beststyle towards this long desired haven of joy. Bess followed moreslowly, and both came panting and smiling up to Miss Cameron, whonever lifted her eyes, but said in that wonderful voice of hers:

'I've dropped a bracelet. I see it, but can't get it. Will the littleboy find me a long stick? I'll keep my eye on it, so the water shallnot wash it away.'

'I'll dive for it with pleasure; but I'm not a boy,' answered Josie,laughing as she shook the curly head which at a distance had deceivedthe lady.

'I beg your pardon. Dive away, child; the sand is covering it fast. Ivalue it very much. Never forgot to take it off before.'

'I'll get it!' and down went Josie, to come up with a handful of pebbles, but no bracelet.

'It's gone; never mind - my fault,' said Miss Cameron, disappointed,but amused at the girl's dismay as she shook the water out of hereyes and gasped bravely:

'No, it isn't. I'll have it, if I stay down all night!' and with onelong breath Josie dived again, leaving nothing but a pair of agitatedfeet to be seen.

'I'm afraid she will hurt herself,' said Miss Cameron, looking atBess, whom she recognized by her likeness to her mother.

'Oh, no; Josie is a little fish. She likes it'; and Bess smiledhappily at this wonderful granting of her cousin's desire.

'You are Mr Laurence's daughter, I think? How d'ye do, dear? Tellpapa I'm coming to see him soon. Too tired before. Quite savage.Better now. Ah! here's our pearl of divers. What luck?' she asked, asthe heels went down and a dripping head came up.

Josie could only choke and splutter at first, being half strangled;but though her hands had failed again, her courage had not; and witha resolute shake of her wet hair, a bright look at the tall lady, anda series of puffs to fill her lungs, she said calmly:

'"Never give up" is my motto. I'm going to get it, if I go toLiverpool for it! Now, then!' and down went the mermaid quite out ofsight this time, groping like a real lobster at the bottom of thesea.

'Plucky little girl! I like that. Who is she?' asked the lady,sitting down on a half-covered stone to watch her diver, since thebracelet was lost sight of.

Bess told her, adding, with the persuasive smile of her father:'Josie longs to be an actress, and has waited for a month to see you.This is a great happiness for her.'

'Bless the child! why didn't she come and call? I'd have let her in;though usually I avoid stage-struck girls as I do reporters,' laughedMiss Cameron.

There was no time for more; a brown hand, grasping the bracelet, roseout of the sea, followed by a purple face as Josie came up so blindand dizzy she could only cling to Bess, half drowned but triumphant.

Miss Cameron drew her to the rock where she sat, and pushing the hairout of her eyes, revived her with a hearty 'Bravo! bravo!' whichassured the girl that her first act was a hit. Josie had oftenimagined her meeting with the great actress - the dignity and gracewith which she would enter and tell her ambitious hopes, theeffective dress she would wear, the witty things she would say, thedeep impression her budding genius would make. But never in herwildest moments had she imagined an interview like this; scarlet,sandy, streaming, and speechless she leaned against the illustriousshoulder, looking like a beautiful seal as she blinked and wheezedtill she could smile joyfully and exclaim proudly:

'I did get it! I'm so glad!'

'Now get your breath, my dear; then I shall be glad also. It was verynice of you to take all that trouble for me. How shall I thank you?'asked the lady, looking at her with the beautiful eyes that could sayso many things without words.

Josie clasped her hands with a wet spat which rather destroyed theeffect of the gesture, and answered in a beseeching tone that wouldhave softened a far harder heart than Miss Cameron's:

'Let me come and see you once - only once! I want you to tell me if Ican act; you will know. I'll abide by what you say; and if you thinkI can - by and by, when I've studied very hard - I shall be thehappiest girl in the world. May I?'

'Yes; come tomorrow at eleven. We'll have a good talk; you shall showme what you can do, and I'll give you my opinion. But you won't likeit.'

'I will, no matter if you tell me I'm a fool. I want it settled; sodoes mamma. I'll take it bravely if you say no; and if you say yes,I'll never give up till I've done my best - as you did.'

'Ah, my child, it's a weary road, and there are plenty of thornsamong the roses when you've won them. I think you have the courage,and this proves that you have perseverance. Perhaps you'll do. Come,and we'll see.'

Miss Cameron touched the bracelet as she spoke, and smiled so kindlythat impetuous Josie wanted to kiss her; but wisely refrained, thoughher eyes were wet with softer water than any in the sea as shethanked her.

'We are keeping Miss Cameron from her bath, and the tide is goingout. Come, Josie,' said thoughtful Bess, fearing to outstay theirwelcome.

'Run over the beach and get warm. Thank you very much, littlemermaid. Tell papa to bring his daughter to see me any time.Good-bye'; and with a wave of her hand the tragedy queen dismissedher court, but remained on her weedy throne watching the two lithefigures race over the sand with twinkling feet till they were out ofsight. Then, as she calmly bobbed up and down in the water, she saidto herself: 'The child has a good stage face, vivid, mobile; fineeyes, abandon, pluck, will. Perhaps she'll do. Good stock - talent inthe family. We shall see.'

Of course Josie never slept a wink, and was in a fever of joyfulexcitement next day. Uncle Laurie enjoyed the episode very much, andAunt Amy looked out her most becoming white dress for the grandoccasion; Bess lent her most artistic hat, and Josie ranged the woodand marsh for a bouquet of wild roses, sweet white azalea, ferns, andgraceful grasses, as the offering of a very grateful heart.

At ten she solemnly arrayed herself, and then sat looking at her neatgloves and buckled shoes till it was time to go, growing pale andsober with the thought that her fate was soon to be decided; for,like all young people she was sure that her whole life could besettled by one human creature, quite forgetting how wonderfullyProvidence trains us by disappointment, surprises us with unexpectedsuccess, and turns our seeming trials into blessings.

'I will go alone: we shall be freer so. Oh, Bess, pray that she maytell me rightly! So much depends on that! Don't laugh, uncle! It is avery serious moment for me. Miss Cameron knows that, and will tellyou so. Kiss me, Aunt Amy, since mamma isn't here. If you say I looknice, I'm quite satisfied. Good-bye.' And with a wave of the hand asmuch like her model's as she could make it, Josie departed, lookingvery pretty and feeling very tragical.

Sure now of admittance, she boldly rang at the door which excluded somany, and being ushered into a shady parlour, feasted her eyes uponseveral fine portraits of great actors while she waited. She had readabout most of them, and knew their trials and triumphs so well thatshe soon forgot herself, and tried to imitate Mrs Siddons as LadyMacbeth, looking up at the engraving as she held her nosegay like thecandle in the sleep-walking scene, and knit her youthful browsdistressfully while murmuring the speech of the haunted queen. Sobusy was she that Miss Cameron watched her for several minutesunseen, then startled her by suddenly sweeping in with the words uponher lips, the look upon her face, which made that one of her greatestscenes.

'I never can do it like that; but I'll keep trying, if you say Imay,' cried Josie, forgetting her manners in the intense interest ofthe moment.

'Show me what you can do,' answered the actress, wisely plunging intothe middle of things at once, well knowing that no common chat wouldsatisfy this very earnest little person.

'First let me give you these. I thought you'd like wild things betterthan hot-house flowers; and I loved to bring them, as I'd no otherway to thank you for your great kindness to me,' said Josie, offeringher nosegay with a simple warmth that was very sweet.

'I do love them best, and keep my room full of the posies some goodfairy hangs on my gate. Upon my word, I think I've found the fairyout - these are so like,' she added quickly, as her eye went from theflowers in her hand to others that stood near by, arranged with thesame taste.

Josie's blush and smile betrayed her before she said, with a lookfull of girlish adoration and humility: 'I couldn't help it; I admireyou so much. I know it was a liberty; but as I couldn't get inmyself, I loved to think my posies pleased you.'

Something about the child and her little offering touched the woman,and, drawing Josie to her, she said, with no trace of actress in faceor voice:

'They did please me, dear, and so do you. I'm tired of praise; andlove is very sweet, when it is simple and sincere like this.'

Josie remembered to have heard, among many other stories, that MissCameron lost her lover years ago, and since had lived only for art.Now she felt that this might have been true; and pity for thesplendid, lonely life made her face very eloquent, as well asgrateful. Then, as if anxious to forget the past, her new friendsaid, in the commanding way that seemed natural to her:

'Let me see what you can do. Juliet, of course. All begin with that.Poor soul, how she is murdered!'

Now, Josie had intended to begin with Romeo's much-enduringsweetheart, and follow her up with Bianca, Pauline, and several ofthe favourite idols of stage-struck girls; but being a shrewd littleperson, she suddenly saw the wisdom of Uncle Laurie's advice, andresolved to follow it. So instead of the rant Miss Cameron expected,Josie gave poor Ophelia's mad scene, and gave it very well, havingbeen trained by the college professor of elocution and done it manytimes. She was too young, of course, but the white gown, the loosehair, the real flowers she scattered over the imaginary grave, addedto the illusion; and she sung the songs sweetly, dropped her patheticcurtsies, and vanished behind the curtain that divided the rooms witha backward look that surprised her critical auditor into a quickgesture of applause. Cheered by that welcome sound, Josie ran back asa little hoyden in one of the farces she had often acted, telling astory full of fun and naughtiness at first, but ending with a sob ofrepentance and an earnest prayer for pardon.

'Very good! Try again. Better than I expected,' called the voice ofthe oracle.

Josie tried Portia's speech, and recited very well, giving dueemphasis to each fine sentence. Then, unable to refrain from what sheconsidered her greatest effort, she burst into Juliet's balconyscene, ending with the poison and the tomb. She felt sure that shesurpassed herself, and waited for applause. A ringing laugh made hertingle with indignation and disappointment, as she went to standbefore Miss Cameron, saying in a tone of polite surprise:

'I have been told that I did it very well. I'm sorry you don't thinkso.'

'My dear, it's very bad. How can it help being so? What can a childlike you know of love and fear and death? Don't try it yet. Leavetragedy alone till you are ready for it.'

'But you clapped Ophelia.'

'Yes, that was very pretty. Any clever girl can do it effectively.But the real meaning of Shakespeare is far above you yet, child. Thecomedy bit was best. There you showed real talent. It was both comicand pathetic. That's art. Don't lose it. The Portia was gooddeclamation. Go on with that sort of thing; it trains the voice - teaches shades of expression. You've a good voice and naturalgrace - great helps both, hard to acquire.'

'Well, I'm glad I've got something,' sighed Josie, sitting meekly ona stool, much crestfallen, but not daunted yet, and bound to have hersay out.

'My dear little girl, I told you that you would not like what Ishould say to you; yet I must be honest if I would really help you.I've had to do it for many like you; and most of them have neverforgiven me, though my words have proved true, and they are what Iadvised them to be - good wives and happy mothers in quiet homes. Afew have kept on, and done fairly well. One you will hear of soon, Ithink; for she has talent, indomitable patience, and mind as well asbeauty. You are too young to show to which class you belong. Geniusesare very rare, and even at fifteen seldom give much promise of futurepower.'

'Oh, I don't think I'm a genius!' cried Josie, growing calm and soberas she listened to the melodious voice and looked into the expressiveface that filled her with confidence, so strong, sincere, and kindlywas it. 'I only want to find out if I have talent enough to go on,and after years of study to be able to act well in any of the goodplays people never tire of seeing. I don't expect to be a Mrs Siddonsor a Miss Cameron, much as I long to be; but it does seem as if I hadsomething in me which can't come out in any way but this. When I actI'm perfectly happy. I seem to live, to be in my own world, and eachnew part is a new friend. I love Shakespeare, and am never tired ofhis splendid people. Of course, I don't understand it all; but it'slike being alone at night with the mountains and the stars, solemnand grand, and I try to imagine how it will look when the sun comesup, and all is glorious and clear to me. I can't see, but I feel thebeauty, and long to express it.'

As she spoke with the most perfect self-forgetfulness Josie was palewith excitement, her eyes shone, her lips trembled, and all herlittle soul seemed trying to put into words the emotions that filledit to overflowing. Miss Cameron understood, felt that this wassomething more than a girlish whim; and when she answered there was anew tone of sympathy in her voice, a new interest in her face, thoughshe wisely refrained from saying all she thought, well knowing whatsplendid dreams young people build upon a word, and how bitter is thepain when the bright bubbles burst.

'If you feel this, I can give you no better advice than to go onloving and studying our great master,' she said slowly; but Josiecaught the changed tone, and felt, with a thrill of joy, that her newfriend was speaking to her now as to a comrade. 'It is an educationin itself, and a lifetime is not long enough to teach you all hissecret. But there is much to do before you can hope to echo hiswords. Have you the patience, courage, strength, to begin at thebeginning, and slowly, painfully, lay the foundation for future work?Fame is a pearl many dive for and only a few bring up. Even when theydo, it is not perfect, and they sigh for more, and lose better thingsin struggling for them.'

The last words seemed spoken more to herself than to her hearer, butJosie answered quickly, with a smile and an expressive gesture:

'I got the bracelet in spite of all the bitter water in my eyes.'

'You did! I don't forget it. A good omen. We will accept it.'

Miss Cameron answered the smile with one that was like sunshine tothe girl, and stretched her white hands as if taking some invisiblegift. Then added in a different tone, watching the effect of herwords on the expressive face before her:

'Now you will be disappointed, for instead of telling you to come andstudy with me, or go and act in some second-rate theatre at once, Iadvise you to go back to school and finish your education. That isthe first step, for all accomplishments are needed, and a singletalent makes a very imperfect character. Cultivate mind and body,heart and soul, and make yourself an intelligent, graceful,beautiful, and healthy girl. Then, at eighteen or twenty, go intotraining and try your powers. Better start for the battle with yourarms in order, and save the hard lesson which comes when we rush ontoo soon. Now and then genius carries all before it, but not often.We have to climb slowly, with many slips and falls. Can you wait aswell as work?'

'I will!'

'We shall see. It would be pleasant to me to know that when I quitthe stage I leave behind me a well-trained, faithful, gifted comradeto more than fill my place, and carry on what I have much at heart - the purification of the stage. Perhaps you are she; but remember,mere beauty and rich costumes do not make an actress, nor are theefforts of a clever little girl to play great characters real art. Itis all dazzle and sham, and a disgrace and disappointment now. Whywill the public be satisfied with opera bouffe, or the trash calledsociety plays when a world of truth and beauty, poetry and pathoslies waiting to be interpreted and enjoyed?'

Miss Cameron had forgotten to whom she spoke, and walked to and fro,full of the noble regret all cultivated people feel at the low stateof the stage nowadays.

'That's what Uncle Laurie says; and he and Aunt Jo try to plan playsabout true and lovely things - simple domestic scenes that touchpeople's hearts, and make them laugh and cry and feel better. Unclesays that sort is my style, and I must not think of tragedy. Butit's so much nicer to sweep about in crowns and velvet trains than towear everyday clothes, and just be myself, though it is so easy.'

'Yet that is high art, child, and what we need for a time till we areready for the masters. Cultivate that talent of yours. It is aspecial gift, this power to bring tears and smiles, and a sweetertask to touch the heart than to freeze the blood or fire theimagination. Tell your uncle he is right, and ask your aunt to try aplay for you. I'll come and see it when you are ready.'

'Will you? Oh! will you? We are going to have some at Christmas, witha nice part for me. A simple little thing, but I can do it, andshould be so proud, so happy to have you there.'

Josie rose as she spoke, for a glance at the clock showed her thather call was a long one; and hard as it was to end this momentousinterview, she felt that she must go. Catching up her hat she went toMiss Cameron, who stood looking at her so keenly that she felt astransparent as a pane of glass, and coloured prettily as she lookedup, saying, with a grateful little tremor in her voice:

'I can never thank you for this hour and all you have told me. Ishall do just what you advise, and mamma will be very glad to see mesettled at my books again. I can study now with all my heart, becauseit is to help me on; and I won't hope too much, but work and wait,and try to please you, as the only way to pay my debt.'

'That reminds me that I have not paid mine. Little friend, wear thisfor my sake. It is fit for a mermaid, and will remind you of yourfirst dive. May the next bring up a better jewel, and leave no bitterwater on your lips!'

As she spoke, Miss Cameron took from the lace at her throat a prettypin of aquamarine, and fastened it like an order on Josie's proudbosom; then lifting the happy little face, she kissed it verytenderly, and watched it go smiling away with eyes that seemed to seeinto a future full of the trials and the triumphs which she knew sowell.

Bess expected to see Josie come flying in, all raptures andexcitement, or drowned in tears of disappointment, but was surprisedat the expression of calm content and resolution which she wore.Pride and satisfaction, and a new feeling of responsibility bothsobered and sustained her, and she felt that any amount of dry studyand long waiting would be bearable, if in the glorious future shecould be an honour to her profession and a comrade to the new friendwhom she already adored with girlish ardour.

She told her little story to a deeply interested audience, and allfelt that Miss Cameron's advice was good. Mrs Amy was relieved at theprospect of delay; for she did not want her niece to be an actressand hoped the fancy would die out.

Uncle Laurie was full of charming plans and prophecies and wrote oneof his most delightful notes to thank their neighbour for herkindness; while Bess, who loved art of all kinds, fully sympathizedwith her cousin's ambitious hopes, only wondering why she preferredto act out her visions rather than embody them in marble.

That first interview was not the last; for Miss Cameron was reallyinterested, and had several memorable conversations with theLaurences, while the girls sat by, drinking in every word with thedelight all artists feel in their own beautiful world, and learningto see how sacred good gifts are, how powerful, and how faithfullythey should be used for high ends, each in its own place helping toeducate, refine, and refresh.

Josie wrote reams to her mother; and when the visit ended rejoicedher heart by bringing her a somewhat changed little daughter, whofell to work at the once-detested books with a patient energy whichsurprised and pleased everyone. The right string had been touched,and even French exercises and piano practice became endurable, sinceaccomplishments would be useful by and by; dress, manners, and habitswere all interesting now, because 'mind and body, heart and soul,must be cultivated', and while training to become an 'intelligent,graceful, healthy girl', little Josie was unconsciously fittingherself to play her part well on whatever stage the great Managermight prepare for her.