Chapter 11 - How D'artagnan, In Discovering The Retreat Of Porthos, Perceives That Wealth Does Not

D'Artagnan passed through the iron gate and arrived in frontof the chateau. He alighted as he saw a species of giant onthe steps. Let us do justice to D'Artagnan. Independently ofevery selfish wish, his heart palpitated with joy when hesaw that tall form and martial demeanor, which recalled tohim a good and brave man.

He ran to Porthos and threw himself into his arms; the wholebody of servants, arranged in a semi-circle at a respectfuldistance, looked on with humble curiosity. Musqueton, at thehead of them, wiped his eyes. Porthos linked his arm in thatof his friend.

"Ah! how delightful to see you again, dear friend!" hecried, in a voice which was now changed from a baritone intoa bass, "you've not then forgotten me?"

"Forget you! oh! dear Du Vallon, does one forget thehappiest days of flowery youth, one's dearest friends, thedangers we have dared together? On the contrary, there isnot an hour we have passed together that is not present tomy memory."

"Yes, yes," said Porthos, trying to give to his mustache acurl which it had lost whilst he had been alone. "Yes, wedid some fine things in our time and we gave that poorcardinal a few threads to unravel."

And he heaved a sigh.

"Under any circumstances," he resumed, "you are welcome, mydear friend; you will help me to recover my spirits;to-morrow we will hunt the hare on my plain, which is asuperb tract of land, or pursue the deer in my woods, whichare magnificent. I have four harriers which are consideredthe swiftest in the county, and a pack of hounds which areunequalled for twenty leagues around."

And Porthos heaved another sigh.

"But, first," interposed D'Artagnan, "you must present me toMadame du Vallon."

A third sigh from Porthos.

"I lost Madame du Vallon two years ago," he said, "and youfind me still in affliction on that account. That was thereason why I left my Chateau du Vallon near Corbeil, andcame to my estate, Bracieux. Poor Madame du Vallon! hertemper was uncertain, but she came at last to accustomherself to my little ways and understand my little wishes."

"So you are free now, and rich?"

"Alas!" groaned Porthos, "I am a widower and have fortythousand francs a year. Let us go to breakfast."

"I shall be happy to do so; the morning air has made mehungry."

"Yes," said Porthos; "my air is excellent."

They went into the chateau; there was nothing but gilding,high and low; the cornices were gilt, the mouldings weregilt, the legs and arms of the chairs were gilt. A table,ready set out, awaited them.

"You see," said Porthos, "this is my usual style."

"Devil take me!" answered D'Artagnan, "I wish you joy of it.The king has nothing like it."

"No," answered Porthos, "I hear it said that he is verybadly fed by the cardinal, Monsieur de Mazarin. Taste thiscutlet, my dear D'Artagnan; 'tis off one of my sheep."

"You have very tender mutton and I wish you joy of it." saidD'Artagnan.

"Yes, the sheep are fed in my meadows, which are excellentpasture."

"Give me another cutlet."

"No, try this hare, which I had killed yesterday in one ofmy warrens."

"Zounds! what a flavor!" cried D'Artagnan; "ah! they are fedon thyme only, your hares."

"And how do you like my wine?" asked Porthos; "it ispleasant, isn't it?"

"Capital!"

"It is nothing, however, but a wine of the country."

"Really?"

"Yes, a small declivity to the south, yonder on my hill,gives me twenty hogsheads."

"Quite a vineyard, hey?"

Porthos sighed for the fifth time - D'Artagnan had countedhis sighs. He became curious to solve the problem.

"Well now," he said, "it seems, my dear friend, thatsomething vexes you; you are ill, perhaps? That health,which - - "

"Excellent, my dear friend; better than ever. I could killan ox with a blow of my fist."

"Well, then, family affairs, perhaps?"

"Family! I have, happily, only myself in the world to carefor."

"But what makes you sigh?"

"My dear fellow," replied Porthos, "to be candid with you, Iam not happy."

"You are not happy, Porthos? You who have chateau, meadows,mountains, woods - you who have forty thousand francs ayear - you - are - not - happy?"

"My dear friend, all those things I have, but I am a hermitin the midst of superfluity."

"Surrounded, I suppose, only by clodhoppers, with whom youcould not associate."

Porthos turned rather pale and drank off a large glass ofwine.

"No; but just think, there are paltry country squires whohave all some title or another and pretend to go back as faras Charlemagne, or at least to Hugh Capet. When I first camehere; being the last comer, it was for me to make the firstadvances. I made them, but you know, my dear friend, Madamedu Vallon - - "

Porthos, in pronouncing these words, seemed to gulp downsomething.

"Madame du Vallon was of doubtful gentility. She had, in herfirst marriage - I don't think, D'Artagnan, I am tellingyou anything new - married a lawyer; they thought that`nauseous;' you can understand that's a word bad enough tomake one kill thirty thousand men. I have killed two, whichhas made people hold their tongues, but has not made metheir friend. So that I have no society; I live alone; I amsick of it - my mind preys on itself."

D'Artagnan smiled. He now saw where the breastplate wasweak, and prepared the blow.

"But now," he said, "that you are a widower, your wife'sconnection cannot injure you."

"Yes, but understand me; not being of a race of historicfame, like the De Courcys, who were content to be plainsirs, or the Rohans, who didn't wish to be dukes, all thesepeople, who are all either vicomtes or comtes go before meat church in all the ceremonies, and I can say nothing tothem. Ah! If I only were a - - "

"A baron, don't you mean?" cried D'Artagnan, finishing hisfriend's sentence.

"Ah!" cried Porthos; "would I were but a baron!"

"Well, my friend, I am come to give you this very titlewhich you wish for so much."

Porthos gave a start that shook the room; two or threebottles fell and were broken. Musqueton ran thither, hearingthe noise.

Porthos waved his hand to Musqueton to pick up the bottles.

"I am glad to see," said D'Artagnan, "that you have stillthat honest lad with you."

"He is my steward," replied Porthos; "he will never leaveme. Go away now, Mouston."

"So he's called Mouston," thought D'Artagnan; "'tis too longa word to pronounce `Musqueton.'"

"Well," he said aloud, "let us resume our conversationlater, your people may suspect something; there may be spiesabout. You can suppose, Porthos, that what I have to sayrelates to most important matters."

"Devil take them; let us walk in the park," answeredPorthos, "for the sake of digestion."

"Egad," said D'Artagnan, "the park is like everything elseand there are as many fish in your pond as rabbits in yourwarren; you are a happy man, my friend since you have notonly retained your love of the chase, but acquired that offishing."

"My friend," replied Porthos, "I leave fishing to Musqueton,- it is a vulgar pleasure, - but I shoot sometimes; thatis to say, when I am dull, and I sit on one of those marbleseats, have my gun brought to me, my favorite dog, and Ishoot rabbits."

"Really, how very amusing!"

"Yes," replied Porthos, with a sigh; it is amusing."

D'Artagnan now no longer counted the sighs. They wereinnumerable.

"However, what had you to say to me?" he resumed; "let usreturn to that subject."

"With pleasure," replied D'Artagnan; "I must, however, firstfrankly tell you that you must change your mode of life."

"How?"

"Go into harness again, gird on your sword, run afteradventures, and leave as in old times a little of your faton the roadside."

"Ah! hang it!" said Porthos.

"I see you are spoiled, dear friend; you are corpulent, yourarm has no longer that movement of which the late cardinal'sguards have so many proofs."

"Ah! my fist is strong enough I swear," cried Porthos,extending a hand like a shoulder of mutton.

"So much the better."

"Are we then to go to war?"

"By my troth, yes."

"Against whom?"

"Are you a politician, friend?"

"Not in the least."

"Are you for Mazarin or for the princes?"

"I am for no one."

"That is to say, you are for us. Well, I tell you that Icome to you from the cardinal."

This speech was heard by Porthos in the same sense as if ithad still been in the year 1640 and related to the truecardinal.

"Ho! ho! What are the wishes of his eminence?"

"He wishes to have you in his service."

"And who spoke to him of me?"

"Rochefort - you remember him?"

"Yes, pardieu! It was he who gave us so much trouble andkept us on the road so much; you gave him three sword-woundsin three separate engagements."

"But you know he is now our friend?"

"No, I didn't know that. So he cherishes no resentment?"

"You are mistaken, Porthos," said D'Artagnan. "It is I whocherish no resentment."

Porthos didn't understand any too clearly; but then we knowthat understanding was not his strong point. "You say,then," he continued, "that the Count de Rochefort spoke ofme to the cardinal?"

"Yes, and the queen, too."

"The queen, do you say?"

"To inspire us with confidence she has even placed inMazarin's hands that famous diamond - you remember allabout it - that I once sold to Monsieur des Essarts and ofwhich, I don't know how, she has regained possession."

"But it seems to me," said Porthos, "that she would havedone much better if she had given it back to you."

"So I think," replied D'Artagnan; "but kings and queens arestrange beings and have odd fancies; nevertheless, sincethey are the ones who have riches and honors, we are devotedto them."

"Yes, we are devoted to them," repeated Porthos; "and you - to whom are you devoted now?"

"To the king, the queen, and to the cardinal; moreover, Ihave answered for your devotion also."

"And you say that you have made certain conditions on mybehalf?"

"Magnificent, my dear fellow, magnificent! In the firstplace you have plenty of money, haven't you? forty thousandfrancs income, I think you said."

Porthos began to be suspicious. "Eh! my friend," said he,"one never has too much money. Madame du Vallon left thingsin much disorder; I am not much of a hand at figures, sothat I live almost from hand to mouth."

"He is afraid I have come to borrow money," thoughtD'Artagnan. "Ah, my friend," said he, "it is all the betterif you are in difficulties."

"How is it all the better?"

"Yes, for his eminence will give you all that you want - land, money, and titles."

"Ah! ah! ah!" said Porthos, opening his eyes at that lastword.

"Under the other cardinal," continued D'Artagnan, "we didn'tknow enough to make our profits; this, however, doesn'tconcern you, with your forty thousand francs income, thehappiest man in the world, it seems to me."

Porthos sighed.

"At the same time," continued D'Artagnan, "notwithstandingyour forty thousand francs a year, and perhaps even for thevery reason that you have forty thousand francs a year, itseems to me that a little coronet would do well on yourcarriage, hey?"

"Yes indeed," said Porthos.

"Well, my dear friend, win it - it is at the point of yoursword. We shall not interfere with each other - your objectis a title; mine, money. If I can get enough to rebuildArtagnan, which my ancestors, impoverished by the Crusades,allowed to fall into ruins, and to buy thirty acres of landabout it, that is all I wish. I shall retire and dietranquilly - at home."

"For my part," said Porthos, "I desire to be made a baron."

"You shall be one."

"And have you not seen any of our other friends?"

"Yes, I have seen Aramis."

"And what does he wish? To be a bishop?"

"Aramis," answered D'Artagnan, who did not wish to undeceivePorthos, "Aramis, fancy, has become a monk and a Jesuit, andlives like a bear. My offers did not arouse him, - did noteven tempt him."

"So much the worse! He was a clever man. And Athos?"

"I have not yet seen him. Do you know where I shall findhim?"

"Near Blois. He is called Bragelonne. Only imagine, my dearfriend. Athos, who was of as high birth as the emperor andwho inherits one estate which gives him the title of comte,what is he to do with all those dignities - the Comte de laFere, Comte de Bragelonne?"

"And he has no children with all these titles?"

"Ah!" said Porthos, "I have heard that he had adopted ayoung man who resembles him greatly."

"What, Athos? Our Athos, who was as virtuous as Scipio? Haveyou seen him?

"No."

"Well, I shall see him to-morrow and tell him about you; butI'm afraid, entre nous, that his liking for wine has agedand degraded him."

"Yes, he used to drink a great deal," replied Porthos.

"And then he was older than any of us," added D'Artagnan.

"Some years only. His gravity made him look older than hewas."

"Well then, if we can get Athos, all will be well. If wecannot, we will do without him. We two are worth a dozen."

"Yes," said Porthos, smiling at the remembrance of hisformer exploits; "but we four, altogether, would be equal tothirty-six, more especially as you say the work will not bechild's play. Will it last long?"

"By'r Lady! two or three years perhaps."

"So much the better," cried Porthos. "You have no idea, myfriend, how my bones ache since I came here. Sometimes on aSunday, I take a ride in the fields and on the property ofmy neighbours, in order to pick up a nice little quarrel,which I am really in want of, but nothing happens. Eitherthey respect or they fear me, which is more likely, but theylet me trample down the clover with my dogs, insult andobstruct every one, and I come back still more weary andlow-spirited, that's all. At any rate, tell me: there's morechance of fighting in Paris, is there not?"

"In that respect, my dear friend, it's delightful. No moreedicts, no more of the cardinal's guards, no more DeJussacs, nor other bloodhounds. I'Gad! underneath a lamp inan inn, anywhere, they ask `Are you one of the Fronde?' Theyunsheathe, and that's all that is said. The Duke de Guisekilled Monsieur de Coligny in the Place Royale and nothingwas said of it."

"Ah, things go on gaily, then," said Porthos.

"Besides which, in a short time," resumed D'Artagnan, "Weshall have set battles, cannonades, conflagrations and therewill be great variety."

"Well, then, I decide."

"I have your word, then?"

"Yes, 'tis given. I shall fight heart and soul for Mazarin;but - - "

"But?"

"But he must make me a baron."

"Zounds!" said D'Artagnan, "that's settled already; I willbe responsible for the barony."

On this promise being given, Porthos, who had never doubtedhis friend's assurance, turned back with him toward thecastle.